In a few minutes, I will be turning 20. I just want to savor every last minute of being a teenager and what better way to preserve the memory by blogging how I feel a few minutes before I officially become an adult.
As far as I can remember or in my 19 years of existence, I have always been sad on the 24th of July. Apparently, bad things happen during that time or day. I have never really enjoyed my birthday and oftentimes I would end up crying on that particular day. I do not know why but it feels like the world has turned against me by making me feel worse during that specific day. There are times that I dread my birthday but we all know that it is inevitable. Maybe it is the fact that I am ageing and getting older. More responsibilities are needed to be taken care of. Others think that it is unusual that I am sad during my birthday but I myself find it weird too.
So now, I am quite scared about what will happen tomorrow or later. I am actually expecting the worse so that it is easier for me to accept the string of events. Though there are times that I expect something great will happen but at the end of the day eventually nothing extraordinary have occurred during my birthday. It is like a normal day has passed and I have had better days in my life.
Now that it grows nearer I am having mixed emotions. NOTE TO SELF: Do not EXPECT! Maybe someday something or someone would break the yearly occurrence of my birthday depression. But tomorrow I wear a fake smile on my face and pretend that nothing is wrong when in fact everything feels wrong. : X
That's alright, Karla. Ageing isn't so bad. When I was young, I hated growing up. But I read this book titled Tuesdays with Morrie and that's when I appreciated growing up. From what I've understood and remembered, growing up should be celebrated because it means that you are more experienced and more knowledgeable in life.
ReplyDeleteYes. There are inconveniences such as added responsibility, but that just makes you a stronger person, right? :)
For me, a person's birthday is not the most special day in his or her year. The most special day is when there are pleasant and unexpected things that gives you thrills and joy. Most of the time, they're not experienced on birthdays but they are experienced by travelling or doing something for the first time and realizing that you love it. Isn't that the reason why we're Tourism professionals?
Who knows, maybe birthdays are overrated. :)
But still, let me greet you a HAPPY BIRTHDAY! This might seem cheesy, but I hope we'll be friends forever. I like having a smart friend. ;)
haha.. I read that book too, I find the book really helpful in realizing stuff about life. What I actually fear most of ageing is the fact that i will get old and die someday. But of course anyone can die anytime regardless the age.
ReplyDeleteI just have this thing during my birthday that I hate the most. Every single year I actually am sad and depressed for no apparent reason. It's as if everything goes wrong.
I totally agree that experience makes us a better person. It teaches us LIFE. I guess birthdays are indeed a little overrated. Maybe we could travel together someday. I think that would be lovely!
Thanks for greeting! I am honored to be your friend. Despite the cheesyness I have to say that I am happy that you are also my friend. It is I think meant to be.. Til we meet again! Ciao!